Have you ever encountered a situation where you know you need to discuss a problem with someone, but are you afraid of it because you know it will only lead to bigger problems? What if there is an easier way to communicate effective language to deal with conflicts and human error? By simulating the clarity and openness of our communication, we can easily express our thoughts and feelings without causing additional trouble and drama. When we face conflicts, this will help prevent personal attacks and defenses.
"Invisible" communication hides the clarity and purpose of communication. This creates confusion, distrust and ambiguity for us. In order to build this trust and reaffirm the openness and quality of our communication, it is important to maintain visibility as much as possible at all times. Once this happens, you can choose the best chance of success in the interaction.
When we open the front door for communication, we have the opportunity to learn great tools to make our communication more obvious and consistent. One such tool is called OTFD. OTFD is an effective skill for everyone; our family, friends, colleagues, and even our children. This approach resolves conflicts quickly and effectively, while maintaining the dignity of the listener while preventing emotional attacks. Both parties can continue to advance and maintain a positive relationship through this communication technology. OTFD, open the front door, metaphor reminds us to communicate clearly through the front door.
' O' On behalf of observation, we can tell each other a completely factual, objective, flying way of what happened so that two people can start on the same page. "I observed that we were invited to meet at noon for lunch, now it is 12:45." This is a statement of facts, not judgments or conclusions; just data.
Next, ' T' put forward "thoughts." Use the "I" statement to tell this person your thoughts and opinions. "I think maybe you are trapped in traffic, or your phone is dead, you have no chance to let me know that you will be late."
' F' represents feelings. Sharing your feelings is also an "I" form. "I am very depressed, you don't let me know that you will be late."
' D' Representing "desire" allows us to state our intentions, or the results we want to see. "I hope that in the future, if you are late, please inform me in advance."
The beauty of this model is its order. Without OTFD, we usually end up hitting all of these areas, but not in ways that others can hear.
By observing, communication allows people to be at the same starting point and listen with an open mind. You can handle many misunderstandings in the first step. If you are unable to process them in the first step, please use the OTFD process to facilitate communication. Programs like the Quantum Learning Network have found that spending extra time organizing our ideas into this sequence will also slow us down and express each part in a calmer, more audible way.
In addition to resolving conflicts, OTFD can clearly and positively communicate expectations. "I found out that your flowers were sent to my office today. I think it is very good. It makes me feel very much. I hope that our relationship will continue to develop."
When we practice OTFD in communication, we can more effectively tell people how we feel and think about a particular situation without making the communication process personal or attacking.
Orignal From: Healthy communication - as simple as opening the front door
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