Wednesday, April 10, 2019

Does the work end in a positive way?

I sometimes hear people who have an affair but are considering ending it. Many people are working very hard to find some redemption factors about this. And even if they don't try to prove it or make excuses, many people want to find something positive. Hope is that it will end well and everyone will continue their lives in a positive way.

Someone may ask: "I know that one day my extramarital affairs must end. I will never leave my family. But this matter has been changing for me. I talked to my best friend about this, she Tell me, I need to be careful, because the situation will never end. Why can't I be an exception? Another person and I care deeply about each other and have a lot of mutual respect. Part of our relationship. I don't understand why it is impossible. "

I won't tell you that it is impossible for two people to decide to end this matter at the same time in complete peace. I won't tell you that this relationship can't end in a friendly way. However, I think this is an exception, not a rule. Many times, one wants to end this relationship more than the other. Or, people have different expectations and opinions about this relationship. Or, someone's spouse finds out and the event must suddenly end and not close. This can lead to injury and even anger.

This is talking about transactional relationships. I am not married. Of course, in this case, most people imagine that their spouse will never find an extramarital relationship, and they hope they will leave it to a better person and a better spouse. I won't say that this is impossible. But this is very rare. Most of the time, whether your spouse is found or guilty is so bad, you admit. Even if this does not happen, you will be changed. Because you will know in your heart that you betrayed your spouse in the worst way. You will know that you have let yourself and your spouse down.

Whether you like it or not, it will affect many aspects of your life. As you might say, I don't think most things will end well. Even if the results are friendly, even if your spouse does not find or forgive you. There are too many betrayals. And too much pain or confusion.

In short, it will change your marriage. It adds a huge, unfortunate challenge. This means you have to work very hard to restore trust and/or do a lot of self-work to figure out why you might betray your spouse first. I realized that you can't take back the time. This has already happened. You can't change this reality. Even if you accept things that may not end well, you can't do it all, so that all of this hasn't happened.

But this is what you can do. You can swear not to extend this. Because if you understand that you won't break your family, what is the point of continuing this? Once it is over, the next step is to start healing and recover. This may not be easy. Cleaning up is usually a huge mess. However, if your spouse is important to you and your family is your number one priority, then you are responsible for it and you have to do what you need to do.

In my opinion, this is the best thing you can do to make sure things end as much as possible. Sometimes, this can really reveal your vulnerability and where you need to work. As long as you finish and finish your work, this can benefit you, and it's always good when things don't just make damage a reality, but at least provide you with valuable lessons and tools.

But don't make a mistake. If this has never happened, then it is even better. But in this case, you are just doing the best thing. I think that it is unrealistic to think that one thing is most likely to end or that there are some benefits, so that the whole thing deserves the pain of others and yourself. I admit that I am biased, but this is my honest opinion on this topic.




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