I received letters from many wives who are expecting their husband's extramarital affairs to be unfortunate. These wives are usually looking for statistics, which can reassure them that this event will be extremely over and a stir.
Someone may ask: "My friends told me that things will never last, and that my husband's business will always end without me having to do a lot of things. In fact, I don't know many people I know. The couple met each other in the face of extramarital affairs and actually left their spouse and got married. It is undeniable that their marriage is unstable and trust is always a problem between them. But their relationship still exists. Is it true that most things are not going on? If so, why?"
digital: from
Most transactions are not persistent, which is absolutely correct. Statistically speaking, only 3% to 5% of things ended in marriage. This is very low. When you consider that 75% of the second marriage fails, you will realize that even if the extramarital couple get married, they will have a lifelong relationship. I suspect that the divorce rate at the beginning of the relationship was higher than the 75% divorce rate in the second marriage.
why? For the same reason, the general matter will not last. I will list some of the reasons below.
This relationship is based on confidentiality, lack of integrity and lies: from
At any time your relationship is based on negative, shameful things, such as confidentiality and lies, which does not give it a good foundation. In fact, even individuals are very proud of the background. From the beginning, there was shame and guilt. While other couples will be proud to recall a meeting in a church or blind date, this cheating couple has to start their relationship in the closet when they lie to others. This is not the best way to start. Not only that, but the couple's friends and family often secretly hope that they will fail because they disapprove of how this relationship begins.
If he does it with you, he will do it for you: from
This may be the biggest obstacle facing the couple. They fight against trust. This is understandable because everyone has proven that they have the ability to cheat and have their spouse become a cheating partner. Since the cheating partner has become a spouse, what is preventing cheating from newcomers? Of course, everyone wants to believe that they are so special that they are soul mate who never need or want to cheat again. Statistically, this is usually not true.
The dynamics of relationship changes: from
Remember when I said that the people in the cheating relationship thought they were special? Well, in a sense, they are right. Marriage is hard to compete with an affair - at least on one level - because it is an illusion rooted in reality. The partner does not have to pick up anybody's dirty socks. And the woman of this matter just wants to focus on positive things - she didn't mean or show any real expectations, especially at the beginning. In theory, this is all interesting.
But when they are in a long-term relationship or are married, this situation will change. Suddenly, she really has to pick up dirty socks. She saw the nose hair of his bathroom and snored on the table in the restaurant. He saw her hair dying and her eyebrows tight. She can only be seen when she is at her best.
In short, the monotony of marriage suddenly replaced the excitement of extramarital affairs. And it's not that exciting and magical. This may have caused two people to be very disappointed and disappointed because they traded and hurt so many people in their old lives, because they now live old life with new people and still have a new set of complications.
In hindsight, things didn't make everything better: from
People often think that this will solve all their problems or insecurities. This is impossible because you have to do it yourself. This is another group of disappointments that will soon become apparent.
In short, extramarital affairs rarely meet its commitments. Once it must exist in reality, it will change. Moreover, it usually starts with so much opposition and it is almost impossible to maintain momentum.
Therefore, I agree with your friends that the odds are in full accordance with your interests - just because the odds and statistics tell us that most things are not repeated, and there is no end of marriage. However, I don't think this is a reason, just sit down and do anything for your treatment. No matter what your husband is doing at the time, you can do a lot of things for yourself to push yourself forward. I think it's important that you don't just wait for him to make a decision or achieve it. Self-help or consulting may mean that no matter what he decides, you will move forward. This does not mean that you must stay away from marriage. It just means you are strengthening yourself so that when you have a solution, you are ready.
Orignal From: Common reasons why transactions don't last
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